Trying to put all of my thoughts down in one place has been a problem since I lost Mark on July 30, 2011. Seems like an eternity, but it was “only” seven weeks ago today that he had his seemingly-routine surgery.
Since his death, I’ve written extensively on Facebook, in emails, in 2 different journals, and on scraps of paper. I know that I need to consolidate these thoughts & feelings, if not for me, for our sons, Andrew and Benjamin, who will maybe someday want to read this history of their dad’s untimely, unfortunate death, and the tale of the unimagined, unexpected journey that Mark’s death has forged as our path.
My main source of healing thus far has been expressing my feelings on Facebook. I also took over Mark’s weekly outdoor column at the Wichita Falls Time Record News as of September 8th. This is a way I can honor him, keep my promise to him to continue to instill a love of nature & the outdoors
in both boys, and maybe experience some peace and healing for myself & for us as a family.
Here are the links to the first week’s columns:
We’ll see how this goes….
Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation.
It’s Father’s Day. Around our home that means Brother’s Day. We started this tradition after we lost Tom a few years ago. Our first Father’s Day without him was difficult, but we made the best of it by making cards and letters expressing our feelings for him and getting out in the beautiful sunshine to enjoy the type of things that Dad used to do with us.
When the second Father’s Day rolled around, I figured it was time for a fresh approach. We came up with Brother’s Day. Here’s how it works. I let the boys sleep in while I prepare their Brother’s Day breakfast in bed. This morning it was french toast with sausages and OJ.
The breakfast trays are prepared with colorful messages from me with one particular character trait each one has shown in the past year that reminds me of their father.
And finally, I write a letter to each one of the children explaining that character trait, how I saw it shown in the past year, and how their father had that same trait in him.
My boys are beginning to look forward to Father’s / Brother’s Day, and I pray that it inspires them to earn their rights to have Father’s Day breakfasts in bed when they are old enough to rear a family God’s way!
We’re not done after breakfast. They boys consider our chocolate lab puppy a brother too, so after church we’re off to a hike with the dog.
Church on Father’s Day is always tough on a widow. I’ll most likely choose to sit near the back and step outside when I feel myself missing the presence of a husband in the home.
Kit Hinkle is the Founder and Ministry Lead for A New Season Ministries, Inc., and an author and speaker. She has lived through corporate careers as a chemical engineer and a management consultant, but now finds her finest career as a home school mother to four teen boys–one of them launched in college. She loves Pilates and her best friend’s Bosanova Christian yoga-style stretching, and craves more walks through the woods with her chocolate lab. Her dream is to live on the beach–and Charleston is just calling her! She knows what it means to be in a new season. She lost her first marriage to divorce when she was very young and lost her loving husband to a heart attack in 2007. To sit with another who is walking through her tough road and show that woman Christ, brings joy and fulfillment to Kit. It’s such an honor to participate in His kingdom.
If you are interested in having her speak, please contact her via email at email@example.com.
Other articles by this author: www.anewseason.net/author/khinkle
Would you like to read more about Father’s Day? Here are some articles you might try:
A Happy Father’s Day? by Liz Anne Wright
Father’s Day by Danita Hiles